Why Everyone Should Watch the Gabriel Fernandez Documentary (Part One Because I Can’t)

I have literally been trying to find a way to write this blog since I finished the documentary a week ago. There is so much to unpack from it that my friends told me to break it into parts. In all honesty, I don’t know what made me watch it and how I made it through. I kind of came to the conclusion that I owed it to him to watch it.

With every episode, I asked “When is this going to be over?” I can’t imagine what he thought while he continuously went through what he went through. So, it is with a heavy heart that I start this blog. I might get it all out today and I might not but just bear with me because this went so much deeper than his abuse.

This documentary touched on the incompetence of people that are trained to spot abuse and do something about it (the security guard saw what a stupid domestic abuse expert was supposed to see and ignored), for profit entities that are supposed to help kids like Gabriel, overworking social workers, homophobia, gangs, usage of children for government assistance, selective abuse, lack of empathy, etc. I could literally write a flippin thesis on this documentary. I will say that Netflix did a great job on this subject. They talked about this from all sides. There was so much that went into the demise of this young boy. One fail led to another and another and the people that actually cared enough to do something got shot down.

I will say that, after watching the documentary, I literally took my lunch and sat in silence for a whole hour. My brain was on fire. I was trying to understand how anyone could do what they did. When they gave the closing arguments about the final beating, I just couldn’t take it but I had to soldier through. That little boy is one of the strongest people in the world to continue to love someone that seemed to hate him so much. But I am getting ahead of myself. As I said, there is so much to unpack. Where do I begin?

Why This Story is So Tragic

This little boy was a good child. When he was born, his mother didn’t want him. So she told her brother who was gay to go and get Gabriel. And that’s what he did. He did that until someone made up a lie stating that the uncle was molesting Gabriel. Yes, because gay men are all pedophiles (I am DEFINITELY being sarcastic here). His uncle and his partner took great care of him and everyone knew it BUT somehow, they were quick to take him from his uncles. Where did he go next? To his grandparents. Okay, cool. But then mama wanted the kids back (he had two older siblings). Why? Because she wanted TANF. She wanted the money so she could continue to be a deadbeat. Great job. In all honesty, the parents don’t even need to be talked about. Where was the father at the time? In jail. He deserves to be talked about because he didn’t do this to the child. He learned about his son’s death while in jail. That had to be heartbreaking.

I will say that, given society’s opinion of homosexuals, I can’t be sure that he would have been in better hands with his father. I don’t believe that Gabriel was gay. His stupid mother and her boyfriend called him “gay” a lot and it was suggested that they made him wear dresses. I don’t know if it was because they were mad that he was treated so well with his uncle and his partner or what but, for some reason, if there is an inkling of a child being gay, men seem to act a fool about it. I have friends on my Facebook page that make jokes about children being gay or how they would disown their child (their own flesh and blood) for being gay. They also claim that kids don’t have the wherewithal to know what they like at a young age (don’t get me started on the Dwayne Wade situation). Funny thing is that they don’t want to do any research or hear from people that would refute that thought. And lets not talk about Anthony Avalos who was mentioned at the end of the documentary. He was beaten to death because his mother overheard him say that he liked boys. So let’s just kill our kids for being gay. Let’s just kill them for being honest. But we don’t like fake people. Okay, I’m sorry, like I said, I’m all over the place with this subject because it really works my nerves. Breathe Kendra, breathe.

I have to stop here. I started THIS blog months ago. I will come back with another part because there was SO much to unpack and I really want to convey everything I noticed in this documentary because it was VERY well done and truly looked at the story from all sides literally. It even touched on the “mother’s” issues even though she didn’t deserve that much.

Published by tallgirl79

Blogging about life. Well, my life. As a black, bipolar, mom to a teenager with special needs, well, there is always a story to tell. From my aversion to having a man to my weird experiences while trying to avoid people, it's all there. Being me is.... different but it always makes for good blogs.

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